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There was once a time in Delhi when shining malls and Café Coffee Days didn’t exist as refuges from heat and stench. In this land before liberalization, sanctuary could be found in the local cinema halls that apparently dotted the Indian urban landscape. But multiplexes are driving them out of business — and, as collateral damage, taking with them the Bollywood poster painters who relied on their business.
Every year, Jenny and I send out a photoshopped holiday card to our friends and family. When we found out that some Bollywood poster painters are still eking out a living near Old Delhi, we knew that this year’s card would be hand-made. We dissected a bunch of old Bollywood posters for composition and style, took pictures of our faces in our desired poses, and set out a neighborhood near the Red Fort armed with vague contact instructions: “Find the Darya Ganj fire station. Make a right. Walk a hundred yards and ask the paan wallah for Vijay.”
The paan wallah sent us to a bicycle rickshaw stand, where sleeping rickshaw pullers competed for space with the myriad rickshaw parts strewn about. We sat at the stand and chatted with Manesh, who seemed to manage the rickshaw syndicate, until Vijay pulled up on a rickshaw of his own. Vijay and Manesh then took us up the dirt road across the street to Vijay’s open-air studio. Fading starlets gave us sultry glances from dusty wooden walls as we sat on a wooden charpoy to talk.
With Manesh translating, we told Vijay exactly what we wanted — the composition, the elements, the style, the poses, the title, the tagline. Happy for the business, Vijay was nonetheless confused about how we’d found him. Not sure how to explain that our relationship with the woman on the expat listserv who recommended him, we just told him that he was “very famous.” His smile told us that that was what he was hoping to hear.
I returned the next weekend with my father and money for the deposit. Manesh wasn’t there; this time, we sat at the rickshaw stand with a drunk mechanic who kept telling us “I speak English tutti-frutti” and “Vijay is my brother” and “You want some whiskey?” Finally Vijay and Ranjeet, his English-speaking partner, pulled up in a rickshaw. We discussed again the composition and the poses while the drunken mechanic danced around, sent a peon for soda, and interrupted us with “Vijay famous artist!” and “My cousin-brother!” and “You want whiskey?”
Jenny and I had anticipated a small poster, perhaps two feet in length — after all, our main goal was to reprint it on a postcard. Vijay, however, insisted that his work could be no less than five feet tall. We agreed, the peon returned, and we celebrated our agreement with Pepsi and whiskey. As we were walking out, the mechanic turned to me to whisper conspiratorially, “I speak English tutti-frutti.”
A week later, we returned to examine the work in progress. Five feet had become six.
And then, two weeks after we had commissioned it, Jenny and I came to Darya Ganj to behold our first starring role, captured in perfect 1970s Bollywood style. This poster accurately recreated the most exciting experiences we’ve had in Delhi so far: our spontaneous dances in various grand ballrooms, the time we fought criminals as special investigators in the Delhi police force, and that awful incident when our love of diamonds and danger forced us to turn our commandeered autorickshaws against each other.
And you thought we were working office jobs!
As Vijay and his team presented their work with pride, Ranjeet reminded us that poster painting is a dying art, and that we should tell our friends. So it’s with no hesitation that we recommend Vijay to capture your likeness in archaic Bollywood style. You can find him near the paan wallah, across from the rickshaw stand, down from the fire station; or you can just contact Ranjeet at 99996 29382 or ranjeet_2870@rediffmail.com.
P.S. Guess which one is the drunken mechanic?
FLASH FORWARD: BOLLYWOOD 2009
JAN 4, 2009 - 1. 3 Idiots: The Bridges of Madison County made an unexpectedly velvety transition from sneered-upon bestseller to critically acclaimed blockbuster, so history is certainly on the side of Rajkumar Hirani’s adaptation of Chetan Bhagat’s Five Point Someone. And it certainly can’t hurt that the cast includes Aamir Khan, Kareena Kapoor, Madhavan, Sharman Joshi and the always interesting Boman Irani.
2. Aashayein, Eight By Ten: Nagesh Kukunoor returns with two films, with two of the last actors you’d expect to see in a Nagesh Kukunoor film. Aashayein stars John Abraham as a gambling addict, while Akshay Kumar plays a “psychological superhero” in Eight By Ten. At least one of them had better be good, if we’re to forgive Kukunoor for Bombay to Bangkok.
3. Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani: We know Rajkumar Santoshi as the artist who dips his brush in testosterone to paint epic canvases of male angst, so it will be interesting to see him helm his first love story since… well, never, because the closest he came was with the thorny Pukar. Ranbir Kapoor and the ubiquitous Katrina Kaif play the young lovers.
4. Aladdin and the Mystery of the Lamp: Sujoy Ghosh oversees this contemporary story of Riteish Deshmukh rubbing a lamp and summoning up a genie with the physiognomy of Amitabh Bachchan. The last time a member of the Bachchan clan tried to pull off a fantasy, the ground shuddered at the impact of the debacle, so let’s hope they know what they’re doing this time around.
5. Blue: Akshay Kumar and Sanjay Dutt are fishermen from the Bahamas, who go deep-sea diving for sunken treasure in what is supposedly Bollywood’s most expensive production ever. We’re being asked to watch out for the underwater action sequences, possibly as a diversion from dry land, where Katrina Kaif awaits with her accent.
6. Chandni Chowk to China: Irresistibly labelled “the first ever Bollywood kung fu comedy,” Nikhil Advani’s film of a lowly cook who’s taken to be the reincarnation of an ancient Chinese warlord appears to be the latest instance of Bollywood’s fascination with winking at itself (and everything else). Akshay Kumar, Deepika Padukone and Mithun Chakraborty hunker down for the hijinks.
7. Dev D, Devdas: Sarat Chandra Chattopadhyay’s tragic hero will be reincarnated twice this year, first through the eyes of Abhay Deol and Anurag Kashyap, and then Shiney Ahuja and Sudhir Mishra. While Kashyap’s take is a distinctly yuppie vision of the story, Mishra apparently wants to conflate Chattopadhyay’s hero with another rich boy who just couldn’t make up his mind, someone named Hamlet.
8. Dilli 6: In his follow-up to the zeitgeist-defining Rang De Basanti – and in the second film of the year to reference Chandni Chowk – Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra takes an amble down the lanes of the Old Delhi neighbourhood he grew up in. The element of nostalgia seeps through to the cast, with Amitabh Bachchan’s son and Anil Kapoor’s daughter.
9. Firaaq: Nandita Das makes her bow as director with this look at the aftermath of the communal riots in Gujarat. The film has been racking up awards left, right and centre – and its cast is to die for (Naseeruddin Shah, Paresh Rawal, Deepti Naval, Shahana Goswami) – but the real point of interest will lie in what Das has to say about a subject that’s been on screen a lot lately.
10. Hisss: Jennifer Lynch, daughter of the great David, making a Hindi movie? With Mallika Sherawat? About a snake woman, the kind you’d find in the trashy potboilers of the seventies? With Irrfan Khan also tucked in there somewhere? What on earth were they thinking? Will this become the year’s biggest goof-up or the year’s most delicious guilty pleasure?
11. Kameenay: Also known as the film for which Shahid Kapoor underwent house arrest, so his top-secret look wouldn’t find its way to the papers. And the film that stars Amole Gupte. (Yes, that Amole Gupte!) And the film for which Priyanka Chopra is boning up on Marathi. And the film that Vishal Bhardwaj has finally gotten around to making after dusting off the accolades for Omkara.
12. Kites: The last time an actor drew so much print about steamy scenes in an Anurag Basu film, her name was Mallika Sherawat. Now, his name is Hrithik Roshan – and he’s part of a threesome comprising Latin actress Barbara Mori and Kangana Ranaut. In his previous release, Hrithik had to wait till the end to consummate his relationship, so perhaps this time around, he took no chances with the material.
13. Luck By Chance: Zoya Akhtar directs her superstar brother in this insider story about the film industry, peopled by Konkona Sen Sharma, Rishi Kapoor, Dimple Kapadia, Juhi Chawla and even Hrithik Roshan. Here’s hoping that film lives up to its trailer, which, in its three minutes, fizzed over with more entertainment than most features manage these days.
14. My Name is Khan: Shah Rukh Khan is back with Kajol. He’s also back with Karan Johar in what is being touted as the latter’s most unflinching film yet, dealing with the dark cloud of terrorism that looms over the present-day Muslim. And in case you’re still sniggering about the seriousness of his intent, Johar has gone ahead and signed – wait for this! – Shabana Azmi.
15. Raavan: Where Thalapathi updated an episode of the Mahabharata, Mani Ratnam’s new film looks towards the Ramayana. And where that earlier film painted a sympathetic picture of Karna, this one reportedly does the same for Ravana. The myth is brought to the modern-day by a huge case – Abhishek Bachchan, Vikram, Aishwarya Rai, Prithviraj, Govinda, Karthik, Prabhu – spread out over two versions, in Hindi and Tamil.
16. Rajniti: More inspiration from the epics, this time for Prakash Jha, who will counterpoint current-day politics with chapters from the Mahabharata. Ajay Devgan plays Karna, Nana Patekar is Krishna, and Ranbir Kapoor will portray Arjuna as a white knight with shades of Rajiv Gandhi. And Draupadi? Why, Katrina Kaif, of course!
17. Rang Rasiya: After taking on the life of a nineteenth century soldier, Ketan Mehta moves on to the life of a nineteenth century painter. Randeep Hooda plays Raja Ravi Varma, whose creativity, among other things, is aroused by the voluptuous Nandana Sen. It’s been a while since Mehta was in full-gear, but maybe this time, one artist found a muse in another?
18. Rann: Considering what a sorry figure he made of himself in front of the media after 26/11, Ram Gopal Varma sure has chutzpah in announcing this film based on… the media. Added real-life resonances come from the presence of Riteish Deshmukh, the exit of whose father’s sarkar was expedited by Varma.
19. Shoebite: Amitabh Bachchan stars as a sixtysomething bookstore owner, whose wife (Sarika) falls into a coma. He then decides to do something extraordinary, something which involves traversing the length and breadth of the country. It all sounds a little too touchy-feely, but let’s not forget that Shoojit Sircar is the man behind Yahaan, which transcended mere touchy-feeliness and became a moving elegy of love and loss.
20. What’s Your Rashee?: Ashutosh Gowariker has apparently had enough of ennobling us. He’s also had enough of the past. And thus he casts are-they-aren’t-they lovers Harman Baweja and Priyanka Chopra in a contemporary romance. Whatever the fate of the film, Gowariker’s bravery is no longer in doubt, at least for casting these two after the evidence of Love Story 2050.
Copyright ©2008 The New Sunday Express. This article may not be reproduced in its entirety without permission. A link to this URL, instead, would be appreciated.
Many people foolishly decide to attempt all these reforms at once, and end up flailing around like turtles on their backs. The secret to success is smart delegation, so it might be more practical, now that it’s been established that the world is an interdependent global village in need of serious reform, for us to work on resolutions for 2009 at a global level, and divvy them up into national tasks, with local adaptations where necessary. That way each player can focus all resources on one real problem, and no one part of the world has to do too much.
Here’s a list of who might take on what.
USA will quit smoking ’em out. It’s bad for you and for everyone around you. They keep setting fire to things, the blowback is awful, and nobody has yet stumbled through the smoke spluttering, “Bring me to justice, for the love of God.”
REPUBLIC OF NAURU will lose weight. A staggering 94 percent of the 14,000 Nauruans are obese, making it the fattest nation on earth and, at 21 sq km, the one most justified in not building too many gyms or, indeed, a capital. Micronesia, second fattest at 90 percent, may have to assist on account of nobody ever having heard of Nauru.
ISRAEL will exercise restraint. These are difficult times, but enough behaving like the Hulk every time one of those Hamas popguns goes off. By the way, what are you doing in the Gaza strip in the first place?
LUXEMBOURG will quit drinking. No, it’s not fair, but somebody’s got to do it. A good way to guard against lapses is to stop hanging out with people from France, Ireland, Portugal and (just to be safe) Russia.
PAKISTAN will stop procrastinating. Seriously. Everyone is sick of hearing, year after year, how Pakistan will set its house in order, fight its own battles, tackle its own problems, and crack down on this, that and the other. There’s no time like 2009, people.
SWITZERLAND will help others. Properly this time, not in the same way as they did during World War II with all the dubious banking stuff. However, it may maintain military neutrality.
ICELAND will save money. It’s only fair to the millions of people and various British coucils, police departments and civic services that got wiped out when the Icelandic economy went poof.
INDIA will get organised. Ha ha! This is the joke one, like ‘I will spend more time with my friends and family’. No, but really, we need to get more organised. We could ask China for a little help.
BURKINA FASO will learn something new. But it just needs to take the lead; developing nations can use a little time and space to improve themselves, and they can also use all the help they can get doing it, but really, everyone will have to work on this one.
NORTH KOREA will spend more time with friends and family. Relationships are not easy, and they need a lot of work, and you have to make a real effort to communicate your feelings. Calling up people and threatening to nuke them doesn’t count.
There, see? It’s not so hard when you share the work.
Happy 2009.
A friend of mine had to hand in an assignment for Computer Science in university. As I understood, it was a relatively easy assignment. And the point is that that friend is very experienced programmer and knows a thing or two about it. Anyway, he had a line in the code which goes like this:
char buf[1024] = “abc”;
You don’t even need to know C in order to understand that line, right? I assume we all agree to that. It simply initializes the buffer with a constant string literal. So his lecturer asked him, what does this line do precisely. And to his surprise his answer was incorrect. The correct answer is that the whole buffer is initialized and then the string constant is copied (this can be done in a few ways, for example copying a buffer with the zeros at the end of it). So today another friend called me on the phone to ask about this thing, why our first friend was wrong about it. Now as a reverser, I suppose I need to know the answer to such a simple matter as well. But, the sad part was that I was wrong as well as the two of them. I fired up the C standard and started to search for the solution. I wanted al iving proof to the matter at hand. Looking here and there it took me around 15 mins to lie my hands on the piece of sentence that settled all that matter down. And I quote:
“If there are fewer initializers in a brace-enclosed list than there are elements or members of an aggregate, or fewer characters in a string literal used to initialize an array of known size than there are elements in the array, the remainder of the aggregate shall be initialized implicitly the same as objects that have static storage duration.”
The underlined text is the answer - If there are less characters than the size of the array to initialize, the remainder has to be initialized as well. There is another clause which explains how the initialization is being done, but for now, let it be ‘zeroing’.
Now the reason I was wrong about it is because I happened to see many (for example):
mov [buf+1], ‘a’
mov [buf+2], ‘b’
mov [buf+3], ‘c’
mov [buf+4], ‘\0′
in lots of functions, and that means the source C code is:
char buf[] = “abc”;
The standard says about this case that the size of the buffer is to be acquired from the size of the literal constant string, don’t forget the null termination character as well. So that’s why I didn’t see the memset coming in to initialize the all buffer. Besides, maybe most of the people code it this way:
char buf[1024];
strcpy(buf, “abc”);
Which doesn’t lead to a memset or other way of initialization of the rest of the array.
Take this simple function:
int foo(int p0, int p1) {
return p1 + ((p0 - p1) & ((p0 - p1) << 31));
}This should generate four operations: a subtract, a shift, a bitwise AND, and an add. Well, with VS2005 it generates something a bit different:
00000000: 8B 54 24 08 mov edx,dword ptr [esp+8]
00000004: 8B 4C 24 04 mov ecx,dword ptr [esp+4]
00000008: 2B CA sub ecx,edx
0000000A: 8B C1 mov eax,ecx
0000000C: 69 C0 00 00 00 80 imul eax,eax,80000000h ???
00000012: 23 C1 and eax,ecx
00000014: 03 C2 add eax,edx
00000016: C3 ret
Somehow the optimizer changed the shift to a multiply, which is a serious pessimization and thus results in a rare case where the code is actually faster with the optimizer turned off!
Oddly enough, manually hoisting out the common subexpression (p0 - p1) fixes the problem. I've seen this behavior before in VC++ with 64-bit expressions of the form (a*b+c). My guess is that the compiler normally converts left shifts to multiplications and then converts them back later, but somehow the CSE optimization breaks this. Yet another reason that being lazy and repeating common subexpressions all over the place while relying on the optimizer to clean up your mess isn't the greatest idea.
The reason for the repeated subexpression, by the way, is because this is an expanded version of a min() macro. I called the function foo above instead of min because it's actually broken -- the left shift should be a right shift. As long as you can put up with the portability and range quirks, this strange formulation has the advantages of (a) being branchless, and (b) sharing a lot of code with a max() on the same arguments.
A FEW GOOD MOMENTS
DEC 28, 2008 - AKBAR WIGGLES OUT OF AN EMBARRASSING SITUATION: One of the great comic moments in Jodhaa-Akbar is when Jodhaa fences her husband into a corner, during a swordfight, after which the nascent emperor – the blades mere inches from his exposed neck – proves why he’d go on to be such a renowned diplomat. He could simply command her to back away, but that would only rouse her Rajput contempt. So he manipulates her sentiments instead, gruffly intoning, “Malika-e-Hindustan, yeh mat bhooliye ke hum aapke suhaag hain.” In a trice, a hero is reduced to a mere husband.
THE DUPE MEETS HIS DEATH: Ranvir Shorey, in Mithya, gives the year’s best performance as a bumpkin who finds himself in the shoes of a lookalike mob boss, and the film (along with this performance) is essentially one long buildup to the scene where he meets his end. He’s in a car with the girl who loves him. His pursuers surround them. They drag her out, but not before she’s kissed him on the lips, and taken leave with this one word: “Bye.” And then, he takes his leave, again with one word, one heart-stopping word that leaves you not just sorry for his fate but shattered.
THE BITCH IS BACK: Bipasha Basu landed herself a magnificent character in Bachna Ae Haseeno, where she navigates the full course from victim to victor. Dumped on her wedding day, with that eternal cliché of mehndi-steeped palms, she pulls herself together and becomes a top model (and one hell of a scary diva-bitch). When the man who broke her heart returns to apologise, she twirls him around her little finger, for sport, till she lets go of him (and her past) at a sensational scene at an airport. She reveals herself to him for just a moment, then the outsize sunglasses go back on. The armour is back – so is the bitch.
AJAY DISSES EK DUUJE KE LIYE: In a rambling sequence in U Me Aur Hum that comes together beautifully at the end, Ajay Devgan admits that he was a huge fan of Ek Duuje Ke Liye when he first fell in love – but as he keeps drinking, he becomes more honest about his feelings. He declares that Hum bane tum bane is the fakest song ever – because no one’s there ek duuje ke liye, for one another; everyone’s really looking out for their own interests, which is why Ajay packed off his Alzheimer’s-afflicted wife to a care facility instead of caring for her at home. It’s a rare moment in a mainstream movie that allows such an unflattering glimpse into a guilt-wracked soul.
AN UNHERALDED TEARDROP COURSES DOWN A CHEEK: With Subramaniyapuram, Sasikumar made a stunning bow as director, taking what would seem an archetypal story about small-town gangsters and then carefully crafting characters out of these archetypes. It’s extremely rare to see, in Tamil cinema, a director who doesn’t feel the need to cue his audience with helpful asides (after assuming them to be brain-dead), but it’s a mark of Sasikumar’s confidence and maturity that when the character in his framing device sheds a tear on his deathbed, you’re not entirely sure if the motivation is remorse or relief.
JAI PICKS THE PERFECT LOVE SONG: Jai (Imran Khan) and his friends discuss how they’d go about serenading the girl of their dreams. The first one picks the hyper-intense Tu hi re, which suggests a love that’s far too involved. The second one goes with Aaja aaja, main hoon pyaar tera, which is ageless, yes, but also too frivolous. And thus we get a key to Jai’s character, when he launches into Mera tujhse hai pehle ka naata koi… Jaane tu ya jaane na. Not only has he justified the film’s title, he’s also the perfect embodiment of this aw-shucks song about lovers just meant to be.
THE BAND SELLS OUT: Rock On wasn’t just about the terrific music, it also showed how terrific friends can be, especially in trying times. The foursome is aware that they need to raise money to buy recording equipment, so these strugglers become stragglers, deviating from their chosen path of Rock into (did you see this coming?) Disco Dandiya. When a doleful Farhan Akhtar, that pop-prince of cool, mouthed the banal words to a massy Nadeem-Sharavan hit, you knew this moment was one for the ages.
CAT AND MOUSE MEET BRIEFLY, AFTER PLAYTIME: Yes, it was completely irresponsible as a message movie, but taken as a thriller, A Wednesday was an utterly unexpected treat, if only for making heroes out of two terrific (but often trivialised) actors, Anupam Kher and Naseeruddin Shah. The cat-and-mouse stuff was chilling, sure, but the grace note that ended the film was in a class of its own. Who knew that the simple action of two people ambling towards one another could produce such an emotional epiphany?
KRISHNAN DROPS HIS SON OFF AT THE BRINK OF ADULTHOOD: When early word came that Vaaranam Aayiram was the story of father and son, of how father affects son and how son is shaped by father, you got the inkling of a collaborative effort – father (Krishnan) and son (Suriya) marching through life, hand locked in hand. But in a most wonderful development, all Krishnan does when Suriya goes off to college is smile and remark that they’re both grown-ups now, leaving unsaid that Suriya’s future is simply what he makes of it. It’s a remarkable life lesson, not least because it’s delivered with remarkably little fuss.
AMAR PUTS ON A SHOW FOR HIS HEARING-IMPAIRED MOTHER: Were it not for Shah Rukh Khan (see below), this would have been the sweetest moment of the year – the scene in Dasvidaniya where Amar picks up his guitar and puts his newly learned strumming skills to use. Sarita Joshi is a hoot as his mother, not least when she, midway through the performance, discovers her hearing aid isn’t in place and makes the necessary adjustment. So what exactly must she have been thinking when presented with a soundless vision of her son emoting like mad? The very thought leaves you with a severe case of the giggles.
SURINDER WOOS HIS WIFE WITH A ROSE… WELL ALMOST: The year’s sweetest moment came to us courtesy Shah Rukh Khan in one of his most endearing performances. (Let’s, for now, forget the other, not-so-endearing avatar of Shah Rukh in Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi.) He extracts a rose from a vase on the dining table and places it next to a note he’s written for his wife, but an instant later, he changes his mind. The rose goes back into the vase – but not before a smile that suggests how happy he is that he thought of this heart-on-sleeve gesture, even if lasted all of twenty seconds.
Copyright ©2008 The New Sunday Express. This article may not be reproduced in its entirety without permission. A link to this URL, instead, would be appreciated.
Now, anyone who has dined in the Juhu area knows that spotting some Bollywood celebrity in restaurants there is a fairly commonplace occurrence. The norm is to not "disturb" them, and "respect their privacy" and so on. So we did that, despite being huge fans of Naseer. No gushing or fawning. No omigawdyouarethegreatestactoreverrrr!!-ing happened, neither did any sosososorrybutcanipleasegetanautoandphotographnaseersirji-ing take place. We went back to studying the menu, with the occasional quick glances out of the corner of our eye. After a while my eye wandered to the other side of the table which was occupied by what I presumed were two random young people. There was a young woman sitting almost right next to me, whom I did not recognize. And some dude sitting next to her whom I had not noticed. Till then.
I looked at him...stared a bit... he looked by and also stared... and gave a tentative half-smile as if to say 'why is this creep staring at me?' I leaned towards my wife the other way and whispered to her "Is that Aasif Mandvi from The Daily Show?". She looked over, and yelled out "O MI GAWD, ARE YOU AASIF MANDVI!??" Their table suddenly started looking at us, and the wife and I both started gushing and fawning at him. How we are big fans of him, The Daily Show, Jon Stewart.... so on and so forth. He thanked us, smiled, then asked us where we were from, because I am sure it must be pretty rare for him to be recognized in Bombay. All this while, Naseer and his wife seemed to have a clearly amused expression on their faces. I am sure they found it hilarious that a bunch of folks in India kinda ignored Naseer's presence, but went gaga over some random ABCD actor. I later overheard Naseer asking what we were talking about, and the woman with Aasif explaining what The Daily Show is and so on.
We all returned to ordering our meals, and no more conversation happened for a while. In the end when we were leaving, Aasif very nicely called us over, shook our hands, said goodbye-take-care etc. Some more gushing happened again from Rupal and me. I believe I also said rather doltishly "Say hi to Jon for me" (yeah right!). Paras says that Naseer was laughing again.
I think we inadvertently made Aasif Mandvi's day. Being out at a table with Naseeruddin Shah in India, and then being fawned over by a bunch of Indians who ignore Naseer completely? That's gotta boost his ego at least a little. It's not that we wanted to ignore Naseer. He is of course Da Man. But spotting Aasif Mandvi was such an unexpected surprise, that it made the wife and I react like complete nerds.
A few days ago, while researching for my chat with Manjula Padmanabhan, I came across an excellent speech she delivered at a Cartoon Congress held last month in Kathmandu. I especially liked this bit:
The common explanation for why humans laugh is that laughing and smiling relieve stress. But this only leads to another question: Why do humans have such a disproportionate need for stress-relief? My own view is that we, unlike other animals, are conscious of the inevitability of death. That knowledge places such a terrible burden of fear on our nervous systems that evolution has provided us with a solution – a hyperactive funny bone. I am sure that, given the option, most of us would have preferred something more substantial − immortality, for instance! But we were not given such a choice. So, this is what we are stuck with: jokes, cartoons, comedians and cartoonists, in exchange for being conscious of our mortality.
Some years ago, neurologists in the UK discovered that smiling had such a beneficial effect on the human nervous system that even a false smile − that is, merely stretching the mouth with the corners turned up – could have the same positive effect on our nervous system as a real smile. This works even when we are feeling gloomy. The point here is that political cartooning is a serious business, one that has a seriously positive role to play in human society. This may also explain why those of us who are employed by newspapers to make other people chuckle are quite often grumpy and bad-tempered in real life. Unlike many of our readers and employers, we are unusually conscious of the nastier facts of life. Our job is to make people smile in the face of the things that make all of us cry − death, destruction, disasters and ugly politicians.
This makes a cartoonist similar to a lion tamer − or, as I would put it, a demon tamer. Our profession requires us to live with the demon of mortality chained to our drawing boards. And every morning, we give it a poke in the ribs, make it stand up on the dining table and sing a silly song for our readers. But the demon does not much like this treatment, so it snarls, claws at us, and in general reminds us that in the end it will win.
I’d blogged four years ago, in the context of cricket, about the phenomenon of false smiles changing the way we actually feel—but in the long run, it’s surely just a temporary palliative. That demon isn’t going anywhere.
On that note, because I like my readers so very much, let me leave you with this beautiful song:
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